Hatred

When I channel my focus on hatred, it is a powerful tool. I used it against that demon lady. She had a body to kill for and so I decided to kill my anger. I turned it to hatred just as you did. I hate you with the frustration of magma. You did nothing except strip down in front of me and unleash your glorious nakedness. When you did that, all that I could wait for was to destroy you. Destruction is good for it allows change. Change is good and evil because it creates life.
There were times when she wanted her sexual desires fulfilled and all that I could do was give her pain. Orgasmic, glorious pain. Her screams did not tell me that, her eyes did. She would come back for more, and I would never allow her to touch me.
One day, I broke a glass and used a shard to scrape skin off of my thighs. I had to let the pressure out. People don't know this, but the colour of blood is exhilarating - the colour. Once I found this source, I decided that this was the end; I would no longer fulfill the desires of that vixen. I thought of killing her but decided against it. Instead, I moved away without a word and sent her vicious reminders of the man she used to be with. I never saw her reactions but I knew that I pained her, because all I wanted was revenge.

Last month, I got married. She is a gentle person and I take care of her. We spend time together and time away from each other. We give each other space and we quarrel once in a while. She knows that I smile often and she also says that I speak in my sleep. She tells me that I speak of holding hands, and once I say that, I put my arms around her. She doesn't know of the demon from my past. She wouldn't believe that I was the same person...

Mist

All shall fade
I cried at that thought
Knowing well, that I truly believed in this.
Death is one of the most evident examples of fades...
Wait for it and live for it
We gnaw at what we hold close
Hoping so much that nothing changes.
But change is what creates entertainment.
Unwanted as it may be...
All shall fade
Hold nothing close
Step back and hold a spear
Jab at who gets close
And crush what gets dear
Better to control sorrow
Rather, its occurrence
Nothing shall remain
For all shall fade

Ladies

It dawned on me a while ago, that she had a hold on me. It wasn't too tight, but somehow it said that there was no escape. The funniest part was that it felt invisible. I had always thought that I would be steering - guess not. Never thought that I would be controlled one day, and even now there is something that tells me that I have not yet been tamed. I still tend to look up and I still tend to believe. May be this is indeed the purpose of life; to make it through, alive. I think about it and I believe that she wants me to come to her, within her circle. The disappointment is that I am drawn. I am torn because I want them both. There is one person who can make me proud and there is another person who can make me content. I wonder if I could choose both of them...

Knife

Sitting on my couch
Dreading the dance and the show
People don't like me anymore
People never liked me, I believe
And then I asked myself something
I asked myself: "Who are you?"

I was dumbfounded
I cried for I knew I was nowhere
There was nothing to anything
I said this as I looked at my feet
They were resting on the coffee table
Just there
No purpose
I punched the wall in anger
Knowing so well it was me who created the need for purpose
Apathy - one called to me
Numb - I called to me

There was no purpose I said
And then I saw hope
A hope that said
"The purpose of life is to go through it alive."
It sounded simple enough

Went to the kitchen
Found a knife
And punctured my chest
I am dying right now
But if I were to die
I could well say...
Purpose fulfilled.

Dust

I look into the sun
And hope for a better day
Pleasing them around me
As I kept drifting to another sky
Follow me now
She was absolutely blind
Blind in heart and free of mind
He said that he would hold my hand
When I said that I did not understand
Shutting people out
And I cried so loud
I cried so loud that night
When I saw that there is nothing there
Only building blocks made of dust
So I toil in search of something blue
Something to keep the fire alive
I'm just keeping the fire alive
There is nothing there
All I see is dust
For I see her jumping to the sky
And I see him gliding through the roads
There are people moaning everywhere
Searching for that fire
That would have laid them bare
Crazy eyes and searching gold
All that they could find was dust
There was nothing there
Except for a little hope
And a little bit of love
Joining hands they walked across the flat
Across the flat earth
Now they live in unison
Away from prying eyes
Away from prying eyes
In their house made of dust

Supreme

No hands to hold
They lay wet
Frowning eyes and burnt black tongues
Shoulders fall as I catch hold
To put you right
To put you right back into your mould
Chisel in hand I stare into your eyes
One crack and the pain begins

No stomach to clasp
My arms are weary
I know you could well rest
Well rest on my chest
But your mind wanders endlessly
Gnawing at things that are dreamy
Well out of reach of all that I offer
Knowing too well that this is for you
This is it

No pillow suits my head now
Dents in the soft
And dense is my skull
The promised land is a dream
All shall be torn
As I will believe one day
In the power of the mundane
Jiving to the lights
Swinging to the hearts

No tear stays back now
Crevices through my skin
Blithe to all else
Rosy skies wipe the water
As I gaze into those eyes
Those eyes belong to an uncertain time
As I clasp my hands
And I wait for approval
From some being I hold divine
From someone who is me

No regrets to the wars fought
Fingers across that skin
Impulses drawn to me
Emotions numbed
As I lay in the snow
And watch the birds fly by
A soft chirp
And I close my eyes
And tell myself
It is but a phase
Of visions gone dry
Of new palletes and strong moves
Light heart and brilliant shine
Bright lights